我把录音听完一遍又一遍，当我不再有感觉时，也许我已拿回我的东西了。

i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...i want to escape...from my life...

这种歇斯底里的宗教音乐……

 

so tired of this game.i wanna return to my real life.everthing about tony is just a dream...a dream...

are u thinking about leaving?

i will let u go.thank u.i will be good.don't worry.

thank u for everything.

are u thinking about leaving?

i will let u go.thank u.i will be good.don't worry.

thank u for everything.

i don't know what's going on but it seems we have lost each other both...

i hope u are not kidding me.

尽管天台无人,但外界的杂音扰得平静的黄昏显得好烦躁. 好耐无坐系栏杆上睇落日啦,仲以为当天可以看到如那时见到的灿烂的火烧云.但系太阳早早地被天边的脏云遮到吾见左了.见吾到落日的失落搞到我忽然觉得持琴的姿势很累人.

睇住西面的红色慢慢变灰变脏,越黎越忍受吾到呢种亵渎.唯有背过身去,尽管我一向唔中意面对灰浊的黑暗降临.但转身先发现,竟原来有个红色的月亮系我背后望左我好耐.很红,很大,如某兽圆瞪的独眼.我放下肩上的琴和它对视,这兽,在周围人群啊啊的喊叫声龙舟练习队隆隆的击鼓声和远处音频调教的吱吱高频率声中渐渐逼近,愤怒的暗红色似乎要将我的眼球都染成红.这种逼近,导致它不止在视觉上膨胀,更在意识中膨胀,不紧不慢,却持续地排挤开其它事物,,天空变得暗红而凹凸不平.我投进去的视线,去到很远很远都没有反射.这种似乎只发生在漆黑中的事情竟然在这里出现而弄得我惶恐不安.不想再看时,而意识却一味等待着视线的回归.甚至要出去追随不知所踪的视线,在我感到整个灵魂都要随着视线离开之时,不得不抬起左手,用小提琴挡住阻止这种空洞的目光继续流失.而它在月光下呈现的剪影,却一下子把整个气氛掉转得诗意起来.有另外一个主角介入,让我忽然意识到那像素不高的手机拍摄功能,然后,我重回到了一贯的旁观者角色.

再次看月时,愤怒的红色已经消褪了.

resently the works have taken up all my time and i was lacking energy to update this space.

today i found a very interesting thing that someone's girl friend had said something ridicules,which seems related to me.i have nothing useful to say but just laugh by myself. what childish and lovely girl.

 

sometimes i'd rather receiving tony's "sweat dream" every night but not thinking too much about complex relationship between the konwn friends.

尽管,这是关于很久很久以后最好是永远不要到来但我却又无力避免的事情.但它依然干净地驱赶了我原本很浓很浓的睡意.

这种预支的烦恼本来应该什么也不是.

也可能不是烦恼罢.生命的前半段结束了后就应该理所当然地开始计划好的后半段,这应该说是某种程度上的成熟?当我最在乎的离我而去后,还有什么有意义的可选择的呢...又或者根本目前的选择就没有意义.有意义和无意义的界定本身就很模糊...

无咩讲,上黎扫尘... 

+近照一张.

 

唉.摄影,陷入了尴尬的境地..还是应该尽快赚钱换机...

长期唔清扫会生虫的这里.比Qzone背叛左我的MSN live 歉疚中.

吾知讲咩添.好闷.开学真系好闷.好似呢家甘,食住朱古力黎上网度日神乍阴公...

成日话人自己又米一鬼样...

不知所谓的生活.
对你地吾住啊..爹娘.....

结果都系无野写.有D野讲同吾讲都无咩差别...再次怀疑MSN用黎做乜的了. 

the forth time i go to macao.
there's nothing to say resently.my vocation comes to the end without any surprise.some hope broken,some dreams shattered.but it seems to be nothing.life itself always comes out to be wordless.
and next term seems to be much more busy.
expecting an long journey some day.

i try hard finding the explanation to my thought,my behavior and my interest etc. .all because i feel pain in life.

 since the day i first felt pain,i knew i'll walk alone at the following days...i don't know how this thinking came,maybe it's from my lovest family. i never complained them, for pain always goes with thinking, i can know much more .

still,i have been thought of myself for so many years but i can get nothing...except one: the biggest pain is the solitude of my life. maybe it can expain why i can't separate from my parents.that's the only place i feel being loved in this world.

算数。 

this endless longing has take control on my mind...i can't escape form it... always stay in my mind steady...who can guide me from this darkness...

nothing will develop...it just always stuggle between hope and despair...

help me...

本大人呢期中意啊！哈哈哈哈。吹啊。 

吾好甘啦，其实呢期几郁闷……

最大的事情系有D伤心。应该系好伤心……发现原黎摆左好沉重的感情入某D事入面但系别人完全load吾到……算数，无野，当我依然系幼稚的幻想中ok……应该系本身我的问题对于你就系完完全全的幼稚和无聊。算了。大家都系自由的系米？我吾想再啉了，大家萍水相逢ok？我依然会当你系f。多谢一直以黎的关照。多谢。多谢。。。

些许妖艳feel的空间，吾系好惯……